As a little girl with dreams of being a Mom and wife someday, I pictured in my mind what it would look like to have a family. We would have 2 boys and 2 girls, a house filled with love and laughter, encouragement, obedience, and a heart for God and his people. In my mind, I pictured a house that would look like Martha Stewart decorated it: a home cooked meal served on the table every night, and everyone pitching in to keep the house clean until we could afford to hire a cleaning service. As a married couple, we would have date nights every week, never argue or have financial struggles, always get along and always be on the same page. It was all going to be so perfect!
I had a charmed life growing up in a home with parents who love one another; in fact, they will be celebrating 50 years of marriage together this December. We were loved, supported, and encouraged to always do and be our best. Life was easy, most everything went as planned, and there were very few stressful or sad times. My parents believed in me and as I result, I believed I could succeed at about everything I tried and for the most part I did. This plan worked for my parents and, most certainly, I was sure it would work for me when I had a family. The bar was high, but, by golly, I would meet or exceed it because that’s just what I did when I set my mind to something that I wanted to be good at.
I’m here to tell you that I have never been so wrong about something in my life. Just because you try to duplicate what you had growing up, doesn’t necessarily mean you will get that same result when you attempt it. My life looks nothing like I pictured it. I am not a good cook and we don’t get to eat together as a family every night of the week. Our house isn’t perfectly clean on a day-to-day basis, but we’re not slobs either. I try to decorate our house to make it feel like a home as best I can on our budget. I don’t go on a date every week with my husband, but I dearly love him. I can’t say that we’re always on the same page and we never disagree, but we do pray together and seek God’s direction in our lives. We most definitely have financial struggles, but God continues to provide for all that we need. I’m not a perfect Mom even though I try to be the best Mom I can be with God’s help, guidance, and direction. I am blessed to have two children that I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt are a gift from Heaven above. They aren’t perfect either; but I can’t complain, they are good kids who are becoming young adults, seeking God. They are both on their journey with Him and He loves them even more than I do and that’s hard to believe because I love them to the moon and back!
My life looks nothing like I expected and yet; it’s everything I had hoped for! I am blessed to have a husband who loves the Lord and loves me. In a short three years, we will be celebrating our 25-year Anniversary Celebration and rededication of our Wedding Vows. I am blessed to have two Heaven sent miracles from above that God entrusted into our care and I am truly thankful that I get to be their Mom. Today I am choosing to let go of perfect picture I created in my mind all of those years ago, so that I can embrace where God has my family right now, in this time and season. We’re all in process and it’s not the end of our story. I am trusting that God will work all things together for good in His time and in His way! I am confident that He will do the same for you and yours!
You are an amazing person,wife, mother, daughter, sister & aunt! Always trust God! I love you to the moon & back!
Heidi
We cannot attain perfect. Only Jesus did that.We can, however, become like him and model him in our lives and in others lives. We can only give what we know and it is the other person’s choice to accept our gift.
You are very gifted in modeling Jesus and I am glad you share that gift with me and so many others.
You are a blessing!
Love you
Sarah
Heidi, I can certainly see that you have followed your dream……a dream to inspire others to be the best that they can be. You are so precious and I can see why my niece, Shelly, loves you so much as her best friend! It is amazing to me how our individual lives can touch one another if not for a few moments, a few days, a few months, a few years or even a lifetime. Our paths cross for reasons that are unknown so that is why we must take every moment in front of us and make it the best that it can be! I just wanted to say how proud I am of you and I loved this story. i will share it with my friends on FACEBOOK! I love you MORE!
This is easy to find & read! This is your journey & you have expressed it in an awesome way!